What a feeling! And how to change it.

A friend of mine asked me today about a dream that she had where she was almost run over by a train, on the same day that she expressed that she felt that very way. This is one example where I believe using dream analysis can be bypassed since the dream emanated from a strong feeling that she had recently. The question then becomes how to move past an emotionally difficult situation in a way that serves you both in the short and long terms.

What do I mean by that? Too often, an emotion feels too painful to experience and we simply bury it. Our methods can range from anesthetizing the feeling with an addiction (such as food, alcohol or even a large dose of TV) or becoming so busy in our lives that we don't have time to think about it. While this technique certainly reduces the immediate expression of pain, it will almost certainly cause long-term issues that will manifest either in our life circumstances or even in the body itself. One example that I've seen is a man who had severe upper back pain. When I placed my hands there to tune into the energy signature of his back, I saw that it was actually extreme emotional pain. He then told me that he dealt with repeated heartbreaks by pushing the emotion from his heart to an area behind him. Over the years, it had accumulated to such an extent that he was no longer able to ignore it. He then had the task to release that energy (in his case in the form of tears), and to change how he managed his emotions.

Easier said than done, but here is the way that I've learned to do it and perhaps it can help you too. There are two completely different methods that I use and I offer you both so you can choose what feels more natural or effective.

The first method is strictly energetic, and very easy to use. Picture yourself standing (without actually doing so!) above the ground by a foot or two. Give the command (benevolently, not with force) to the difficult emotion to fall to the floor from wherever it may be representing itself in your body. Picture it falling to the ground as if you had just brushed off some dust. Then picture a huge broom sweeping away all of the emotional debris laying on the floor in one large movement. I call this "The Big Sweep" for short. If you do this with conscious intent, you can actually feel the emotion being released, either in part or completely. You can use this technique for any feeling, from a strong flareup to a minor annoyance.

The second method calls for a little more involvement. There are some schools of thought that encourage you to allow yourself to feel the emotion completely, without judgment, so that it's acknowledged and then can be released. This can be very effective for some, where others need a more intellectual approach (this is where my left brain comes in and wants to be included!) Here are the steps that I take:

1. Acknowledge the feeling. Denying that you're feeling this will get you nowhere. In this case, you're not necessarily called to feel the full intensity, just to recognize that you are feeling this, even if this is a feeling you don't want associated with you. For example, if you are feeling angry, just say so to yourself and let go of any judgment that you have connected with anger. It just is.
2. Next, detach from the situation a little so you can have a better perspective. Focus on uncovering the truth rather than labeling yourself in any way.
3. What triggered this emotion? Your first reaction will probably be to state the external circumstance or person who caused you to feel this way. While this is entirely natural, a more productive approach will be to look at what this means about you. For example, if someone just ended a relationship with you, then your feelings could include: grief at losing what you had, fear that you won't find another relationship this wondeful, fear that you're not lovable enough, anger at the changes you'll have to make (changing habits and traditions, losing some friends, gaining responsibilities, etc.) and uncertainty as to what life with look like from now on.
4. You now have more clarity at exactly what's going on inside. You can then choose how to respond to each of these different aspects. In many cases, simply recognizing what's at the root of your reaction will dissipate the associated emotion.

The other very powerful way to approach a difficult situation is to remind yourself that everything happens for a reason. Often, the reason is not clear when the situation arises, but knowing that there is one can help you deal with the present moment. Because inquiring minds want to know, especially in my case, here is a short and incomplete list of "reasons" that I've experienced:

• There is a pattern in my life and I haven't noticed it yet so it keeps returning. I probably haven't realized this yet since it comes disguised in different clothing every time.
• I absolutely need to learn a particular lesson at this time so something just happened to highlight it in a way that I can't ignore.
• There is an emotion buried inside that needs to be brought to the surface in order for me to deal with it and this situation just "assisted" me in doing just that.
• There is an agreement that my soul has with another and there is no earthly reason I can know this unless I "tune in" at a different level.
• There is baggage from a previous lifetime that I need to heal now. (I know these last two may challenge your beliefs, and if so, please simply ignore them.)

A final comment: no matter what you're feeling, a hug will normally help. May you be blessed with at least one today!
Helene